Resolutions Or Goals?

My son asked me the other day if I had any New Year Resolutions this year. I responded that I don`t make resolutions. I make goals. I write them down and then I track my progress and I get things done. I may not accomplish every goal but I do seem to get more things finished than many people.

A resolution is a firm decision to do or not to do something. Shouldn`t every decision be resolute? Why bother making a decision if you are going to be wishy-washy about it?

Make A Decision

If I decide I am driving across town I do it. If I decide I will no longer smoke, I quit smoking. Why complicate the matter? A few years ago I did quit smoking. I was physically addicted so it was not an easy decision. I knew I needed to make the decision for a while, and I put it off because I knew it would be difficult. Once I decided though there was no changing my mind. Why waste time changing my mind? Addiction just meant it would take a few tries. I decided, therefore it was a done deal. I worked on it until I succeeded. That is what one does when they make a decision.

When I was in my early twenties I had a fantastic mentor named Russ.  He told me that people would follow me if I was resolute in my decisions. If I could not convince myself that I had the answer and continually changed my mind, why would anyone follow that? Why should they?

There is statement of wisdom that comes from the book of James in the Bible. It says that a double-minded man will receive NOTHING from God. Why? Because he can’t even decide what to ask? He can’t decide what he wants. He can’t decide what to work on. One day he is planning to buy a business. The next day he wants to move to another city. Then he thinks about getting a job, but first he will knit some slippers. Nothing gets done. He goes from one little task to another, perhaps completing a few things so he deceives himself that he is getting somewhere. No resolution in decision making brings nothing to fruition. This person can’t bless himself with anything finished, never mind have God bless him.

Resolution, Goals And Wasting Time

Firstly let your “yes” be a “yes” and your “no” be a “no.” Be resolute in that. You will get more done and others will at least know where you stand and then they can decide if they want to get on the wagon with you or not.

Secondly set goals that you actually intend on working on.

Recently I had Murielle Clements a very good life coach give me a consultation. It was amazing. She nailed the areas of life that I needed to work on and it was really a very productive time. I realized that I needed work in my family life, my relationships, my career, my finances and my health. However, I also realized that there was no way I could work on all of those things at once. I like to work on one thing at a time when it comes to self-improvement. So I picked one thing. One thing I will work on this year. There are other times when I can work on other things. She loved that I knew that. Most people think they can do it all at once, and most people are no better at all at once than I am.

At work or in business we need to set goals. In our personal lives we may be able to focus on one other area, but do one at a time. It makes your goals more achievable. You can’t train for a marathon, audition for The Voice, be a CEO of a start-up company, and be the dart champion at the local pub. So many people try to do all of that AND run 4 kids to soccer, volley ball, ballet, art lessons, and piano. What are you thinking? The kids will be more successful too if you teach them this. Pick one thing at a time and set goals with that one thing.

It is a waste of time to make resolutions and to make goals if I have no intention of changing. What is the point of writing my goals down if I am going to put them into my desk drawer and hide them away? Why say that my resolution is to lose weight if I know I am not going to make time to go to the gym right now? That is just a waste of time and money if I buy a membership and some diet shakes. I have zero intention of following through.

Ask yourself if you are serious and if it is even a feasible goal right now? Will it fit into your life to make the necessary changes? Would it be better to wait until spring when a brisk morning walk is a more likely exercise that will get completed?

Setting Goals Is An Easy Thing To Do

Setting goals is not rocket science. Just write them down. Keep them in front of you. Look at them often. It is actually like using a grocery list when you go shopping. Keep it simple.

Make a 1 year goal and then break that into 90 day chunks. So now what do you have to do in the next quarter to prepare you for success in the bigger picture of one year? Make a To Do List.

Use a journal. Write at the beginning of the journal “This year I am going to be a better ____________.” Every time you have a thought about it write it in the journal. Write your goals in there. Record a few lines out of a book that you are reading about that subject. Keep that journal handy. When you go to a course on the area that you need to improve, use that journal to keep notes. Ask your mentor questions about that area of life and write their answers in your journal. Use it all year. You will be surprised how much you change and how much closer you get to your bigger goal.

Get others to hold you accountable. Use a system for your business like Manifast to keep everything together and get it all done in stages, or join the CIBN MasterMind Level so you can get the help that you need to move forward at brainstorming sessions.

Failing At Goal Setting

Everyone fails at goal setting. Get over it. Stop beating yourself up for failure. So what!

Anyone who has never failed, has never tried anything worthwhile.

Why are people so afraid of failure? Why are they afraid to try? Why are they afraid to write goals down because it may be embarrassing if someone sees their failure? Why are they afraid that others will mock their goals? Why would you even care what someone else thinks?

I pay my bills. NOBODY ELSE. Who pays your bills? So why would you care what their opinion is? You have to look at you in the mirror every day. You are not competing with anyone but your own previous performance. You are not obligated to react to another person’s judgement of you. Their opinion is irrelevant. Most of them don’t care anyway, we just “think” they have an opinion. In reality we don’t even occur to them. We did not make the list of important things for them to interfere with today. We were not even in their thoughts. Our own vanity makes us think they are focused on us and our own fear keeps us paralyzed. (I know I am pretty harsh, but it is true, isn't it?)

Fear is faith in reverse. It tells you that everything bad will happen. It is irrational. It stunts your growth and binds you from succeeding. Get over it. Put one foot in front of the other. Write your goals down. Break them into nice bite-sized pieces and get going. One step at a time. You will fail. You will succeed. You will fail some more. Then you will learn and you will succeed some more. Two steps forward, and one step back. Over and over again until you winning more than you are losing.

Start Today

Get out your pen. Don’t just make a resolution. Make some goals.

Always Loyal2U,

Kerry George

Be The Change

Be the change you wish to see in the world – Gandhi

Long ago I realized you can’t change the whole world at one time. In fact, it is even difficult to impact a small part of the world. However, there is one thing that we all have the power to change. That one thing is ourselves.

This is probably why people make New Year resolutions. They want to exercise their power to change. Yet they typically don’t put a lot of thought into a resolution and they usually don’t think about how hard it is to change. Yes we have the power to change. But change is difficult. It is a process and it takes a commitment. The reality is that even if we have the will power to change we will likely still fall and make mistakes. The key is to keep working on change and keep moving forward realizing that it will be difficult and that there will be those that are not cheering for us along the way.

Did you ever make a resolution to lose weight? Maybe you buy a membership to the gym and you start out the year going to yoga and walking on your in home treadmill. But the first couple of weeks go by and you miss a class, and then you get knocked off schedule by a trip out of town. Soon you are snacking at midnight and there is someone right there to point it out and call you a hypocrite. Now the choice of change is really upon you. This is where the rubber meets the road. Are you going to quit and let them be right? Or are you going to persevere?

All goals require planning. Set yourself up for success. Put the patterns into place and then follow through. If you are a salesperson and you have a goal to make more money this is not rocket science. You simply must either make more appointments or increase the amount that you are selling in the appointments that you have. So book the calendar and make a plan. When you fall off the wagon, get back up and start again. Real change takes real perseverance.

If you think the world needs to be a greener place then focus on being greener. Be the example you want others to follow. If you think people should be bigger givers, then you become a bigger giver. If you don’t have anything to give, there is a nice Scripture to learn. It says to sell something so you can give. That is a great lesson for those who think sales is a bad vocation. J  Make more money to give more away. That is better than pointing the finger at those who make more money than you do and demand that they give more. Be the example.

Whatever you think the world needs… become that…

I met a business coach recently who was bemoaning the fact that many people do not realize they need her services. Really she is a mentor looking for people who want to be mentored. So I asked her who was mentoring her? She did not have a mentor and did not see the need for one. 

Interesting… She does not believe in her own vocation. Sad, she does not realize that if one wants to be the best mentor they must have great mentors to learn from. That is not something you are going to get from a book.

Whatever you think that the world needs… become that…

Recreate yourself in 2013

I know that I will…

Kerry George