Lie To Yourself

Apparently what we tell ourselves is important. We continually tell ourselves all kinds of things. Much of it is negative. Much of it is not true. We just think it is true at the time.

For instance we typically say things to ourselves like "I never am on time." Is that true? Are you NEVER on time? Isn't that an exaggeration? If you have a job, you must be on time some of the time or you would get fired. So that can't be true.

We all lie to ourselves continually so it is important to tell ourselves lies that bare good results. You have heard of faking it until you make it. Some people think that is not real. I happen to know that it works. There were lots of things that I faked it on. I pretended to be good a public speaking. I pretended over and over and over and over again. I faked it so much and I told myself that I was good at it. Now most people would agree. I rock at public speaking. That was not true the first time I did it. My knees knocked. I forgot what I was saying. I shook. I had no confidence. I just made myself do it and I told myself I was going to be good at it. Eventually I became good at it. I am sure you can think of something that you faked for a while too, and then you got good at it.

Affirmations can feel like faking it at first. I have heard folks say affirmations don't work. Well actually they do, but you also have to work. You have to keep saying them. If you write out one sentence and say it sometimes. You won't get much of a result.

A few years ago when I first went into business, I knew I had to change the way I thought about things considerably. I was making no real money and I had to change the way I was thinking about money. I had realized that I thought money would only come to me through hard work. Money came to others without hard work. Money came to others who were seemingly undeserving, so that meant it should work the same for me. I wrote down, "Money comes to me easily." I put it on the lid of the toilet seat so I would see it every time I went to the bathroom. I put it on my steering wheel in my car. I wrote it out in my journal and stuck it to the top of my computer screen. I said it several times a day. I doubled my income that year, and the next and the next after that.

Affirmations worked. I knew it. I had seen it.

Rael Kalley my habits coach reminded me of that when I started working with him last December. His plan was a little more radical so I decided to give it a go. He taught me to write out my affirmations with a lot more detail and to spend 5 to 7 minutes at a time thinking about how having that thing would make me feel. He also encouraged me to say them a minimum of 6 times a day. Things started to change right away in some areas.

I was saying "Money comes to me in an avalanche of abundance through my brilliant ideas." In less than 48 hours I had a really huge brilliant idea. It made me a bunch of money really quickly. That was very cool.

The affirmations that I was saying about what I ate took about 2 months to kick in. I wasn't ready for change immediately. My head rejected the sayings at first and recognized them as lies. I was saying, "I only desire foods that drive me closer to my ideal weight of 150 pounds." I laughed out loud the first few times I said that. I thought about the beer and pizza I was planning to enjoy and giggled as I ate them, but I kept saying it. Within 30 days I was desiring less pizza. In fact, I was rejecting milk products like cheese and sour cream without even thinking about it. I was not ordering them when I was at a restaurant, instead of insisting on them bringing me a vat for my baked potato. I stopped ordering extra dressing and condiments. I had 1 beer instead of 3. My cart at the grocery store was suddenly full of fruits and vegetables instead of processed foods.

My exercise lies took even longer. The first month I said "I love to exercise," and I physically grimaced when I said it. I thought of going outside and then I shuddered. Yuck. Who wants to do that? I did not even have excuses. I didn't need them. The answer was not even "No." It was a loud, "HELL NO!"

Kerry George
Walking at Nose Hill Park

I made my first commitment to exercise in January and by mid February I realized I was not going to do it. I was not ready. I decided instead to just keep lying to myself until the lie seemed closer to truth. It took a few months. In March I tried to go for a walk. I took 5 steps and went back in the house. Yuck. Then it snowed. That was a great excuse to put it off for a while longer. It was in April that I realized that I felt ready. May 1 was going to be the big day. Francois was going to help me. He was going to go with me. We were planning to do it 5 days a week. Now we do it 6 days a week. Last night we went bowling as well. It is awesome when you have a partner or even a friend who will support you. Now I had 1 less excuse.

Affirmations work. If you work the affirmations, they will work for you.

Write out your affirmations. Not just one line. Write out how you want it to be as though you already have it. Write about wealth, and health, and things you want to accomplish as though you already did it. Write out things you want to have, as though you already have them. It should be several sentences long. If you don't like to write, start with, "I love to write." Tell yourself some worthy lies that you want to become reality.

Now I love to lie to myself and the lies are good ones. I tell myself I am what I want to be so often, and so hard, and with so much emotion that I am becoming the lie. It is my new truth.

What kind of affirmations are you writing for yourself?

Tell us all about it below in the comments. In writing out your commitment and sharing it with the world you are one step closer to doing it always. Also please subscribe to these blogs on the top right hand of the page.

Whispering Walkway
Through the woods in Nose Hill Park